Narrow beds, self-gratification and big penises – the first Sex expert always knew Council
At the beginning of the 20th century. Century, there was no education in the schools. The company was not very inhibited about Sex, you language. And on the other hand, the brothels flourished. In this Era, Marie Stopes published her guidebook “Married Love” to English: the love in marriage.
Stopes was the first modern letter-consultant. Men and women sought their advice in sexual matters. At times you got 1000 mails in just one week.
Dangers of Sex
The people were not only ignorant, Sex was a dangerous thing at the time. In the case of sexually transmitted diseases there was no cure promising medicine, once infected, threatening a life-long infirmity. Many women died in childbirth, they had passions fear of Sex, and the resulting pregnant. “Decent” men, in contrast, wedded miss desires your “animal” and were looking for help to complete the marital act in a way that your partner should not suffer unnecessarily.
General way of thinking was that Sex for women was a disgrace. To Marie Stopes published her counselor 100 years ago. She urged that Sex should not be a miserable duty, but a pleasure for a man and a woman. A shocking Thesis of the young scientist. Stopes wrote: “It is not every man conscious that he is becoming a woman Once and for all when he marries you. He must Woo her before every single act of coitus.”
Time of upheaval
Stopes’ book sold to the sensational, and the time was ripe for it. Everywhere in the First world war had led to a fracture, the world of the 19th century. Century was lost. It is the Era of employees began the mass production of consumer articles, and the Newspapers and magazines. And also the Era of women began. Self-employment and self-confident professional activity of women were still in a long time, of course, but also no exotic special cases. The young scientist with a doctoral degree was even part of this Transformation, and they met the tone of the time. You helped your readers to gain control over your body.
More than 10,000 letters to Stopes have been preserved in the British Library. They give a picture of the Fears and hopes of the ruled then the bedroom.
Extracts from the letters
“I am a young mother of two beautiful children. I had a terrible time at the birth. The doctor told me that I should get any more children. Could you give me some advice on how I can prevent any more coming?”
“I was asked by a friend to collect reliable information on the following topic. You remember, to marry a man who is much younger than you. She is 61 years old and of course the monthly periods have stopped some time ago.
She fears that there is absolutely no Chance at maternity. This is so? I attach a stamped, self-addressed envelope and pay the consultation fee.”
“Tonight, I have read your book “Married Love”, and I can’t go to bed without writing to you to thank you for the great hope for the future of my married life, which has given me the book.”
“If you refer to it in her important book, Married Love, on the question of the positions, I think that I will be allowed as someone who has more than 20 years of an unusually happy married life behind, maybe a few words to Supplement what you have written,
I do not think that the experience of the lady who said that she felt each Time, almost crushed, is so unusual. I know a beautiful, young woman says himself, you would not wish that her husband would be so difficult.
“It is shocking to think that her delicate body is nailed under a heavy man tense and tight. This is both stupid and unnecessary.”
“I write to know whether you can give me some advice. I’m only 27 and have five children, the oldest nine years and the youngest 18 months. My husband is unemployed and me is a constant worry – from one month to the next plagues, because I don’t want to have more children. In the hope of a speedy answer.”
“Would you please tell me where I can purchase your book on birth control the devices mentioned? I don’t have the courage to walk into a Store. A head nurse told me that I should go to the hospital for Women, but since you didn’t tell me what I should ask, I went.”
“You should write something about the narrow separate beds which have been imported from the countries of the continent. I don’t understand how you a Pair of comfortable positions, but we have used it never will.”
“We have a beautiful little baby girl. Three children were born to us before, but this is the first Time that a child lives. Since her birth, I had no real intercourse with my wife, because I had the feeling to give her back all the pain you had with the dead children. Also, she has no desire to have children.
We love both the joys of married life. I play with my fingers with her while she keeps my “Person”. But I have the feeling that we are doing wrong, and now am at a loss in regard to my duty.
I don’t call my name the letter, but perhaps you will be discussing in the next book you write on this topic of this matter.”
“Indicates a dirty state of mind, when a man gives in to his Desire for fornication, or a woman to her desire for simple fornication?
Also if you are married – unless, that is, the conception, the goal of sexual connection. Nothing degrades the mind more than this Form of legalized fornication. Why don’t you recommend the only clean way? The Abstinence!”
“Return to your country of Scotland, and you preach your dirty methods. Decent English people are disgusted by your filthy suggestions in Married Love.”
“I am writing to you for your advice, because I am very worried. The man I’m going to marry this year, had a few weeks ago in an accident. As I helped, his blood-stained and to remove the torn clothes, I couldn’t help but notice that his sex organs were very large. Since then, it worries me, the thought of marital relations, as I am in this regard, small.
Could you advise me or suggest something, what helps me?
I would be grateful if you would tell me, because I have no mother or sister, who can I ask in this matter, and I would like to ask any friends, otherwise you might think that I am too hasty.”
So your consultancy work was memorable and so great their services are to the medical care of women, Marie Stopes is not without controversy. How many sex researchers of the time, they advocated a social-Darwinist theories on the eugenics.